Open dialogue and empathy

Everyone’s experience of maternity or parental leave is different. How people feel about returning to work and the support that they may need differs as well, so it is crucial to create an open dialogue and regular check-ins for those first few months back.

Don’t try and give people all the answers. Empathy and understanding is more important

Keep the conversation going. It’s not a one-week adjustment, so keep checking in throughout the following months, actively listening and asking about their experience as a returner like you would with a new starter’s probation.

Flexible working and sick days

One of the things that no one tells you is that nurseries and childminders are hives of germs.

Not only will your child likely get all sorts of bugs, so will the rest of the family. Flexible working and plenty of sick leave is crucial.

Avoid any deep work, meetings or presentations close to drop-off or pickup times. Keep to the middle of the day as otherwise it adds extra stress to an already difficult time. Make sure the whole team are aware of this.

Building confidence

Confidence can be low when staff return to work, so giving people the time to settle back in and giving them confidence-boosting work or feedback is important.

Everyone who comes back is anxious in some shape or form, but they would have been hugely missed and their value magnified during their time away. Them knowing this can be a great remedy to the lack of confidence they’ll be feeling.

Never, ever, underestimate how tiredness can affect people! Give everyone plenty of empathy and understanding if they’re suffering from a lack of sleep.

Having open and honest conversations about development and career progression can help build confidence. Otherwise there is the risk that the returner feels like they are taking steps back just because they have new family commitment

My job has stayed the same but every single part of me and my life has changed. I’m not sure how to handle that.

Returning parent

Get people back up and running

Have IT and kit set up so the returner doesn’t have to chase, adding more stress to an already difficult first day.

Considering running a re-induction like you would a new starter. Assume people don’t remember many of the organisation’s policies. This will help build confidence no matter how much or how little has changed.

Make sure that the whole team expects to have catch-up sessions put in their diary over the first few weeks, so the person returning can get those relationships back up and running.

Get used to talking to adults again

It’s good to remember that a lot of parental leave can be just a parent and the baby so adult conversations can be a real draw to coming back to work for some.

They don’t want to be just you and a computer, so organise in person time as soon as practically possible if you can.

Consider implementing a buddy system so that the person returning has someone that they know they’ll speak to every day. This takes the burden away from them to organise catch ups and gives an important line of support in case they are finding things tough.

Invest in professional support

Look at investing in a professional coach to help with confidence and working out what their new normal looks like.

Returning from maternity leave is a very fragile time. Often our self-worth is tied into how we perform as mothers and workers. And we feel pressure to work as if we weren’t parenting and parent as if we weren’t working.

So much of the success of returners depends on their own self-awareness, confidence and ability to manage their mindset in those first months, as well as on the awareness and empathy skills of their line managers.

This can only be tackled in a bespoke way, there really isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach.

Thank you

Thanks to Cristina Tiberian who has supported a number of our team return to work after maternity leave.

The vast majority of points in this article are taken from the fabulous and generous people on this LinkedIn post.

Our particular thanks to:

Finally, ‘The Maternity Return‘ campaign from Maltesers is also worth checking out.

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What can managers do to help people coming back from maternity or parental leave?

There is no one-size-fits-all solution, but there is lots to be done