What can managers do to help people coming back from maternity / parental leave?
There is no one size fits all solution, but there is lots to be done
Open dialogue & empathy
Everyone’s experience of maternity / parental leave is different. How people feel about returning to work and the support that they may need differs as well, so it is crucial to create an open dialogue and regular check-ins for those first few months back.
Don’t try and give people all the answers — empathy and understanding is more important
Keep the conversation going. Its not a 1 week adjustment, so keep checking in throughout months 1,2,3 - actively listening and asking about their experience as a returner, like you would with a new starter’s probation
Flexible working & sick days
One of the things that no one tells you is that nurseries / childminders are hives of germs.
Not only will your child likely get all sorts of bugs, so will the rest of their family. Flexible working and plenty of sick leave is crucial.
Avoid any deep work / meetings / presentations close to drop off or pick ups. Keep to the middle of the day as otherwise it adds extra stress to an already difficult time. Make sure the whole team are aware of this.
Building confidence
Confidence can be low once you return to work so giving people the time to settle back in, and giving them confidence-boosting work or feedback is important.
Everyone who comes back is anxious in some shape or form, but they would have been hugely missed and their value magnified during their time away…. them knowing this can be a great remedy to the lack of confidence they’ll be feeling.
Never, ever, underestimate how tiredness can affect people! Give everyone plenty of empathy and understanding if they’re suffering from a lack of sleep.
Having open and honest conversation about development and career progression can help build confidence. Otherwise there is risk that the returner feels like they are taking steps back just because they have new family commitment
“My job has stayed the same but every single part of me and my life has changed. Not sure how to handle that…”
A returning parent
Get people back up and running
Have IT and kit set up so the returner doesn’t have to chase, adding more stress to an already difficult first day.
Considering running a re-induction like you would a new starter — assume people don’t remember many of the organisation’s policies. This will help build confidence no matter how much or how little has changed.
Make sure that the whole team expects to have catch up sessions put in their diary over the first few weeks — so that the person returning can get those relationships back up and running.
Get used to talking to adults again
It’s good to remember that a lot of mat leave can be just you and the baby so adult conversations can be a real draw to coming back to work for some.
You don’t want to be just you and a computer, so organise in person time as soon as practically possible if you can.
Consider implementing a Buddy System so that the person returning has someone that they know they’ll speak to every day. This takes the burden away from them to organise catch ups and gives an important line of support in case they are finding things tough.
Invest in professional support
Look at investing in a professional coach to help with confidence and working out what your new normal looks like.
Returning from mat leave is a very fragile time — often our self-worth is tied into how we perform as mothers and workers. And we feel pressure to work as if we weren’t parenting and parent as if we weren’t working.
So much of the success of returners depends on their own self-awareness, confidence and ability to manage their mindset in those first months, as well as on the awareness and empathy skills of their line managers.
This can only be tackled in a bespoke way, there really isn’t a one size fits all.
PS - Big shout out to Cristina Tiberian who has supported a number of our team return to work after maternity leave
Particular thanks to:
Also — this from Malteasers is worth checking out — https://www.maltesers.co.uk/maternity-return
